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Archive for the ‘Yay Hooray!’ Category
Everyone We Love Is Brilliant. MURDERTRONICS WINS GRANDPRIZE IN MAJOR LAZER REMIX CONTEST!!!
Monday, November 2nd, 2009I’m not a lesbian…
Wednesday, October 28th, 2009
But I like to kiss girls!
AND NOW YOU NOW WHERE TO GET LOADED ON THE REGULAR
Monday, October 19th, 2009
FINALLY BEN ROBEY IS BACK IN TOWN!!!!
I once watched Ben Robey ask a nun if she had the time and she pulled out her tits and said its nippo-clock.
the three of us laughed and laughed and laughed, cause when you’re right, you’re right!
(i dont give a fat fuck if that made sense. i ate two big handfuls of painkillers when i woke up today, STILL trying to recover from the party sat night. but hold up! jah is a bartender! how much fun is THAT gonna be? shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit)
TMRW NIGHT! MURDERMURDERMURDERMUttERMURDER
Friday, September 11th, 2009
Go to this shit, get wasted, live a little, punch a cop, get someone preggers, and bring a knife! (why, you ask? because you should ALWAYS carry a knife. a big fat motherfuck of a knife. I do. we ALL do.)
Chief How-To’s: Phone Booth Removal
Thursday, September 10th, 2009Now remember boys and girls, it’s illegal to tamper with private property blah blah blah. I’m tired of looking at the same old-ass Fox TV ads.
Monster Island. Get yo’ Freak On!
Sunday, September 6th, 2009
Okay, so the block party was yesterday, and it was pretty awesome. Insane noise. Insane burgers. Insane jams inside the Ocropolis. But if I’m not mistaken, there’s still some pretty great art hanging around Monster Island and its neighboring galleries, especially “Fit for Habitation”, a collaborative installation at Live With Animals (210 Kent) that’s like bringing your grandma’s back yard into your living room. Take drugs and go see it!
Tonight—Monster Island—Go There!
Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009
Come see Titus Andronicus and the So So Glos before they kick off on their tour of US and Canada!
Doors at 8pm//$9// all ages
It’s the most fun you’ve had in a basement since you found grandpaw’s jug of ether.
She’s so wettttt
Sunday, August 30th, 2009
Emilie Branch PHOTOOO
TOMORROW NIGHT!
Friday, August 28th, 2009
Suppppppposedly, this is going to be a pretty ragin’ rager! Is 170 Tillary Street is going to BURN DOWN? Go and tell us! Also, tell us if you got some! SUMMER IS ALMOST FUCKING OVER SO GET OFF YOUR COUCH AND MAKE OUT WITH A SEVEN IN SOME CUTE PUMPS! BOOM!
From the Chief Archives: Posterboy Chats With Chief
Friday, August 28th, 2009Over a year ago, Posterboy (Henry Matyjewicz) was nabbed by the NYPD for being a fucking genius and scrambling the shit out of subway posters… EVERYWHERE. BUT! Before he was brought in, Chief got a chance to talk with him about the execution of some of his gnarliest pieces, on video. The following was taken in the fall, here in New York. Enjoy!
Look Up, Stupid!
Thursday, August 27th, 2009
Well-placed strategery is what street artist Judith Supine is all about. This little number was placed on top of the Williamsburg Bridge this past week. You can see his Central Park flasher and more on his Flickr page.
Kurt Vile: Childish Contant Hitmaker
Thursday, August 27th, 2009
It’s story time late Friday at Cake Shop. The the gin and Yuengling-soaked crowd silently folded onto the floor, as Kurt Vile picked along his first song, a thick curtain of hair slightly muffling this lyrics. Although seemingly out of nowhere, (actually Philadelphia, by way of Boston) the band leader of Kurt Vile and the Violators has been emulsifying his sound for years, and has garnered him a dedicated following, and a fall release on Matador Records.
“My dad was into bluegrass and stuff, and he used to play it all the time, but it didn’t really hit me until much later that it influenced me. Old timey old folk music– my dad played a lot of that. But he also played a lot of Beatles records,” said Vile. [He]bought me a banjo when I was fourteen; I really wanted a guitar, but he bought me a banjo, and i just kind of played it.” It’s this kind of anecdotal memories that explain Vile’s performance style. He brings a marriage of old-tyme folky jukes and low-fi distortion and effects that is purely instinctual; like floating down a lazy river while watching a distant airshow. (more…)
Bill Clinton-Smooth Operator.
Wednesday, August 5th, 2009Just look at that picture above. Clinton is all calm, cool, and collective; like Berry White in the face of ten thousand panties.
According to breaking news from Reuters last night, Clinton went to North Korea to speak with Kim Jong Il about the two American journalists Euna Lee, and Laura Ling who were recently captured, and sentanced for espionage or some ish. In less than 18 hours, Kim Jong Il granted them a ’special pardon’. Although the White House is shy about admitting exactly why Clinton went, they know this pee paw silver fox was their last bastion of hope. Converstation probably went something like this:
Bill: Heyy Kim–that is such a beautiful name; I sure you get that all the time. (winks)
Listen baby, I know you want to hold onto these two to demonstrate your fierce omnipotence and power, but I need to take them back to America.
Jong Il: Never! they must be punished for trying to spy on the fearsome North Korea!
Bill: Baby, you’ll always be the most bad ass dictator in my heart, and everyone I talk to, I promise. Let me take you out and we can discuss this matter, just the two of us Kimmy, so we can be alone.
Jong Il: (lowers his eyes and mumbles) Only if we can listen to Fresh Horses.
Bill: (thumbs up)
WuTang-The Mystery of…LEGOS!
Monday, July 27th, 2009HOT GIRLS!!! The day before my mom’s bday edition!
Wednesday, July 22nd, 2009
For all those who don’t fantasize about getting their dicks bit off. It’s been a hectic day at chief, what with exciting world of dildo sex, and a man named Andrew Haghen attempting to purchase my underwear.
Enjoy the hot girls and have a percocet on us.
love,
x
Countdown To Female Pleasure Week!
Wednesday, July 22nd, 2009
We’re gearing up for our annual “Female Pleasure Week”! Oh, and to all the womyn out there that just snorted and said something like, “every week should be female pleasure week!”, yeah, we agree, this is SCIENCE though. Basically, all the ladies in the office are going to explore and experiment with all the new, neat (and often times ridiculous) items marketed towards giving women mind-blowing orgasms and/or inducing ejaculation. We’ve got a solid list of product we are going to get our hands on- oxytocin, liquid orgasm, and, we just added G-Spot Gel! This shit is supposed to increase sensitivity and “enlarge” your g-spot. Want to know what enlarges my g-spot? A clean apartment, folded laundry, a tivo full of Top Chef and peanut M&Ms. Baby, take your fuckin’ shoes off before you enter my house… mmmm… gettin’ me so hotttttt. Get it? I’m old! And sad!
So, yeah, if you come across any products we can test out or work for a company that makes shit like this, please let us know/send us stuff. We’ll repay you in jizz and smiles.
Tonight! VICE ANNUAL PHOTO SHOW! I’m IN THIS THANG! (So come on out and lets DRINK!)
Thursday, July 16th, 2009
edzipco edzipco edzipco
come out at 6pm! drink on my dime, that is to say Vice’s dime, which for one night only, is my dime.
(they got all the drinks for free, cause they aint stupid. lets drink on invisible dimes!)
love,
Ed Zipco
We Found Her!
Wednesday, July 15th, 2009
After years of nonstop, grueling research (by EVERYONE on the staff here at Chief)… WE FOUND HER.
SHUT. IT. DOWN.
Raekwon at Chief
Wednesday, July 15th, 2009
Raekwon spent the day at Chief! Look at all the awesome shit we played with. The interview will be released soon- some intern slave should be transcribing as we speak…
Working Class Computers That Actually Work
Thursday, July 9th, 2009
Google has just revealed a plan that will save the working class from being eaten alive by elite technocrat fucksticks (i.e., Bill Gates). The plan is for Google to create its own operating system, one that is designed to run the GoogleApps suite of programs all on its own. This means that we’ll no longer a) have to pay hundreds of dollars for new operating systems and other software, b) download illegal versions of said software, or c) wallow in our own technological illiteracy because we’re too stupid and/or broke to follow out options a or b.
I don’t imagine that Karl Marx would be much of an investor if he were alive today, especially in this market. But if he was going to invest in any company, he would obviously choose Google. The main principle behind Google Chrome is one that Socialists around the world would generally agree with: streamline otherwise unaffordable programs from one big powerful computer to millions of smaller, less powerful personal computers. Being able to share programs and operating systems like this would make it unnecessary to spend thousands of dollars on a badass laptop, because really, your laptop would just be like a portal that hosts fancy programs from one of Google’s super computers. Now, if Google would just get involved in the health care business we’d be all good…